Friday, May 28, 2004


This Is Exactly How I Want To Choose My President

Oh, I weep for our political discourse.

Poll Shows Voters Prefer Bush at Barbecue

HAMDEN, Conn. - Voters would rather flip burgers and drink beer at a backyard barbecue with President Bush than Sen. John Kerry, according to a national poll that found Bush leading Kerry on "regular guy" qualities.

Half of the registered voters surveyed said they would rather have a barbecue with Bush, while 39 percent chose Kerry and 11 percent either didn't know or would not answer the question posed by Quinnipiac University pollsters.

More voters also would trust Bush, 46-41, to run the family business. But voters were evenly split on whether they would rather have Kerry or Bush teach their children.

Mickey Carroll, the director of the Quinnipiac Polling Institute, said these offbeat questions were asked to try to get a peek at the personal, regular-guy qualities of each candidate.

On the question of whom to vote for, though, voters were evenly split — 43 percent picked Bush, 42 percent chose Kerry, 6 percent chose Ralph Nader (news - web sites), and the rest said they did not know, would not answer, would choose someone else or would skip the election.

"On the likeability, regular-guy quotient, probably Bush comes out a little bit better, but with who are you going vote for, it's a standoff," Carroll said.

Carroll said the regular-guy quotient factors in to how voters make their choices, along with the candidates' stance on the issues and their experience and leadership qualities.

Associated Press

See, George is just a hand-shakin', back-slappin', owns-a-farm, country-fried-steak-eatin', Regular Guy™.

While John Kerry, on the other hand, is a french-looking, big-word-knowing, complex-sentence-using, fine-dining, Elitist™.

Why anyone would want just some Regular Guy™ for one of the most important offices in the world is beyone me. And the whole concept of who is an Elitist™, oh, that bugs the crud out of me too.

THEY ARE BOTH ELITES! Why is it that people can't see that?

Clearly, there is a real cultural divide in this country. But what makes an Elitist™ in people's eyes?

Well, we're in luck because, in that Horatio Alger, we all can do it sort of way that people seem to think is only open to the desire to make loads of money, those sorts of things are open to everyone.

Everyone can watch the Fine Living Channel and see the snooty types telling you what wine to buy. Everyone can purchase and read books. Everyone can go to university.

Heck, thanks to those darn liberals, you don't even have to buy the books, you can check them out from the local public library, and you might get financial help to go to school.

Everyone has the opportunity to improve themselves.

So, why, in the hard-right universe where hard reason rules and where it's only the liberals who are always bringing up and fighting the culture wars, why is this particular field of cultural combat ok.

Why is it ok to call John Kerry an Elitist™ because of his penchant for good food, massive wealth, and huge private mansion, but it's NOT ok to call Rush Limbaugh an Elitist™ because of his probable penchant for good food, massive wealth, and huge private mansion?

Just who in the world thinks Rush Limbaugh is a Regular Guy™?

The argument for the massively wealthy is that everyone can get there too. We all have the opportunity. All we have to do is formulate an money making idea and exploit foreign workers and we can live in a huge private mansion too.

But the same holds true for the unspoken definition of an Elitist™. Pick up a dictionary. Read a book. Watch Martha Stewart. It's all waiting for you.

But no, we want the Regular Guy™ to be president because we don't like the Elitist™.

I just don't get it.

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